Fandom: DC's Legends of Tomorrow
Pairings/Characters: Sara Lance/Leonard Snart
Summary: Watching Sara with his baby self, Leonard contemplates a life he never wanted before.
Timeline: During 1.12 (The Refuge).
Word Count: ~1,180
Disclaimer: I claim no ownership over these characters. I am merely borrowing them from DC Comics, Greg Berlanti, Marc Guggenheim, Andrew Kreisberg and Phil Klemmer.
Betas: Thank you to angelskuuipo and shanachie_quill for looking this over for me.
Author's Note: Title from song by same name from the musical Kinky Boots.
Leonard was near the monitor for the storage room they'd put the younger versions of Mick, Sara, and himself in, so he saw their Sara enter the room with Mick.
"Okay, bathroom and food break," Sara announced.
"What about the baby?" Young Sara asked.
"Have Gideon make a bottle when you get some food," Sara suggested. "Bring it back with you."
"Who's Gideon?" Young Mick asked.
"I'll take care of it," Mick said, herding the teenagers out of the room as Young Sara handed baby Snart to Sara.
Leonard paused what he'd been doing to watch Sara alone with the baby version of himself, trying to make sense of the sensation that ran down his spine.
Sara paced, rocking the baby in her arms as she made silly faces at him. "You really are the sweetest baby," she cooed.
Leonard's breath caught at the sudden sense of longing that rushed him like a tidal wave.
He'd been intrigued by Sara almost from the moment he'd met her, when she talked about having been dead so casually. She'd lived in both the darkness and the light and was the better for it. The fact that she was beautiful was undeniable.
He knew that if he allowed himself, he could care for her very deeply. And that thought terrified him.
Now, watching Sara holding the baby version of himself, he could almost picture her holding a child of his, rather than a past version of him. A child they could create together - and have fun doing so - that would have his eyes and her hair and both of their stubbornness.
He'd never wanted children. He never wanted to risk hurting a child the way his father had hurt him and Lisa. Having practically raised Lisa by himself was enough for him.
He wasn't the kind of man who felt the need to perpetuate the family line; the family name. Snart men were bastards, himself included, and it was best to let that name die with him.
But what if that wasn't true?
What if he had a partner who understood him, like Sara understood him? A woman who wouldn't let him get lost in his head. Who would call bullshit. Who would beat him bloody if he even thought about striking his child.
Rip appeared by Leonard's side, watching Sara and the baby for a moment. "It's remarkable how something so small can change your worldview forever," Rip commented. "The first time I saw my wife holding Jonas, I knew that I would unravel time to protect him. He filled a void in my life that I never even knew existed until he was placed in my arms."
"Why are you telling me this?" Leonard peevishly asked.
Rip looked pointedly at the monitor before looking at Leonard. "You, more than anyone, except perhaps for Ms. Lance, know that time is fleeting. Don't waste it being afraid."
"I'm not afraid of anything," Leonard postured.
"Then stop dicking about and get the girl," Rip said.
"You're the last person I'd expect to start encouraging shipboard romances," Leonard said, not denying that he would like nothing better than to have Sara.
"I've hardly objected to Ms. Saunders and Dr. Palmer's relationship," Rip reminded him. "You could say that I've come to realize how precious love is, so when it's found, it shouldn't be denied."
"Who said anything about love?" Leonard said, nearly choking on the "L" word.
Rip gave him a pitying look. "It's written all over your faces."
Leonard's head whipped up, having caught the plural.
"Ah, you did not think that Ms. Lance returned your affection," Rip guessed. "I think you'll be pleasantly surprised if you make an overture."
Leonard frowned and glanced at the monitor. Sara had settled on the floor and was stroking the baby's cheeks with one finger and he felt that pang of longing again.
"We'll see," was all Leonard said before leaving the room.
He'd intended to go to his bunk after leaving Rip, but somehow his feet took him to Sara. He opened the door and leaned against the doorjamb. "I'm not being any trouble, am I?" he asked.
"He's a perfect angel," Sara said using that ridiculous baby voice. Sara grinned and looked up at him. "What happened to you? You were so sweet."
"Lewis happened," Leonard said, moving to sit cross-legged on the floor in front of Sara, so close they were nearly touching.
"Oh, right," Sara said, sobering. "Did you want to hold him?"
"That's all right," Leonard said. "He seems pretty content where he is." After a beat, he added, "You're good with him."
"I used to like babies," Sara said, shrugging one shoulder. "When I was young me's age, I used to babysit a lot."
"You don't like babies now?" Leonard asked. Sara looked at him in confusion. "You said you used to like them," he clarified.
"I haven't been near any babies for a long time," Sara said. "This little guy is pretty easy to like."
Aware of the cameras in the room, and that Rip was probably watching them, Leonard refrained from asking how she felt about the adult version. For now, at least.
He was saved from saying anything else by the return of Mick and the teenagers.
"Back to work," Mick said, handing the bottle to his younger self while Sara passed the baby off to her younger self.
Sara and Leonard stood and headed towards the door. "You coming?" Sara asked Mick when he didn't turn to follow them out.
"I'll stay until he finishes the bottle," Mick said.
Leonard walked with Sara, keeping the conversation going now that they weren't being observed. "Do you want one?"
"One what?" Sara asked.
"A baby," Leonard said.
"Honestly, I don't know," she admitted. "I used to want one. Figured I'd get married and have children someday. All that changed when the Gambit went down. For a long time after that all I could think about was survival. Then the life I led wasn't exactly suited for family life. Still isn't. Why, do you?"
"I never wanted children," Leonard admitted, meeting her eyes. "Until today."
"Seeing yourself as an innocent baby made you want one for yourself?" she asked, grinning.
"Something like that," he agreed. "With the right partner."
There was no way she could mistake the heat in his eyes as he said that.
Her breath hitched as that sunk in, and then she smiled seductively at him. "You asking me to make babies with you?"
"Maybe someday," he conceded, then smirked. "Although I thought we might practice for a few years first."
Sara laughed. "Sounds like fun."
"Oh, it will be," Leonard promised.
He stepped in close, reaching up to cup her jaw as he leaned in to kiss her. After only a moment of surprise, Sara kissed him back, holding his face with both hands.
"You were serious?" she asked when they parted for breath.
"Very much so," Leonard admitted. "You?"
"About babies? Ask me again after we've practiced. A lot." Sara grinned, leaning up to kiss him again.